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dear misterwitchboy #3


Hello hello! I'm back again with dear misterwitchboy! This is the monthly-ish series I do where I do a free and public reading for one of my newsletter subscribers. I get to do a reading for someone who might not otherwise have the means and ya'll get a chance to see what it's like to be in a reading with me. And I'm here with episode #3!


Read on for a quick overview of the reading. A quote I found the most comforting: "We want to take care of yourself through this, not abandon yourself for the sake of something else." I'm trying to remind myself of this everyday. I hope it comforts you too.


From me and my cards,

Aaron

 

Question:

I am going through a situation where my close friend has been distancing himself from me, and becoming more withdrawn. I love him dearly and want things to be like normal but whenever we talk it's just short and cold. We live together, and he has been busying himself with different boys all the time, I'm just not sure what to do.


Five of Swords

What are the stories floating around this situation for you, on your lips or on his, in your mind or in his? How has sparse communication and more distance helped or hurt the situation?


The Magician

As you gather the research, the data, the stories of what has been going on, remember that you are in charge of what you create out of that raw material. What is the story you'll tell from now on?


Page of Chalices

Moving from the head to the heart. Validating and remembering the pure feelings that you had at the start of this relationship. Listening to the pure feelings you're having right now too.


Seven of Chalices

What in your wildest dreams would be the outcome you wanted for this situation? In your heart, what feels like the right thing to do now?

 

Full Transcript:

I am going through a situation where my close friend has been distancing himself from me, and becoming more withdrawn. I love him dearly and want things to be like normal but whenever we talk it's just short and cold. We live together, and he has been busying himself with different boys all the time, I'm just not sure what to do.


Hello hello! I’m Aaron aka misterwitchboy and this is Dear MisterWitchBoy, the series where I do a free and public, but anonymous, tarot reading on a topic one of my lovely newsletter subscribers send in. That’s right, if you are a newsletter subscriber of mine, you can send in a question that might be chosen for the next dear misterwitchboy. So subscribe!


To this subscriber who sent in this question, thank you so much for sharing that with me, with us. I don’t take the trust you put into me lightly, especially with topics like this which are very close to home and very personal so thank you. This is coming a little later than you sent this question. Hopefully things have sorted themselves out. And if they have, in whatever way, maybe this will be a good look back at what happened and where you were when you sent this question. And if you’re still in it, hopefully the cards will help you to get through it. People a lot fo times worry a lot about their romantic relationships I feel. Or at least a lot of people who come in are asking about that. But I feel like friendships can almost be more complicated. And especially if you’re living with that person there’s so much intertwined between you two and so I can understand how it can be difficult, especially a really close friend that you’ve maybe been friends with for a long time.


Starting off with the Five of Swords. The next card that came up was The Magician moving into the Page of Chalices into the Seven of Chalices. This is an interesting array of cards and not really what I was expecting save this first card. The Five of Swords as you can see there’s this battle going on, but it’s sort of clumsy battle. It’s sort of a weird fight. Nobody really knows where their swords are or some people are looking at butterflies flying around. There’s a lot of wind going around and the trees are going back and forth. And so this is some sort of argumentative conflict that is happening and that seems possibly where all this started of—the swords, being talking and communication and language and the way you say things and the story that you’re telling yourself and other people, that being a little mixed up. It’s an invitation to think of the narratives that you were telling yourself, that you were telling them, that he was telling you. Just the stories that were floating around at that time, maybe they still are. And this question always makes me think of the power that you have to stop those fights. This is not necessarily the smartest fight or a fight that is actually getting things done if that makes sense. Sometimes there is a lot of frustration and stuff that you just don’t know how to express in the right way, to communicate what you’re trying to say, or you’re receiving that kind of energy. And so this Five of Swords is a lot of words, a lot of space, a lot of air everywhere. And that right out of the gate is a sort of wild place to be.


Now it’s interesting because you were talking about communication being short and cold. This cold mountain where all of the swords in this deck are set reminds me of that. So maybe it wasn’t a lot of words going back and forth , but a lot of space, a lot of—the swords feel very distant. They feel sometimes very cold. This card astrology wise has to do with Venus in Aquarius. And Venus, this planet that loves to bring things together and make connections and make relationships, in Aquarius which is sort of a dryer land, not so warm and fuzzy, feels like that sort of cold, distant, but loving relationship that you were describing, at least on your end. It feels very “I love you,” but from far away. “I love you” in ways that I don’t know how to say.


And then The Magician comes next. And the Magician is all about the materials that you’re creating with. You can see that they have in their hands this raw material. It’s like you are the channel also for things to come through you: creative things, ideas, projects, words. And that’s the one I’m going to focus on because this card is Mercury. That’s the planet that rules how you say the thing, what you are saying. Very in the same vein as this air energy. But this card as a major is really reminding you that you have the final say in the narrative of what is happening, to sort of take back your power with the story. And that doesn’t necessarily mean controlling everything. But it could mean laying out the things that you are in control of and the things that you’re not. And being really purposeful with your words there. So if there is this narrative in your head that you had control over this, that it’s your fault, that you should have done this thing—and I’m going to try to focus, as I try to do it all of my readings, on your situation, not so much what he is thinking or what he has thought, or his situation. In my readings I try really hard to remind you of yourself now because that’s where you have the most power that’s where you have the most control. So in this situation talking about, “Okay, what are the words that I’m saying about this as I’m writing this question, as I’m telling this to other friends? What is the language that I’m using? What am I calling him? What am I calling myself? What am I calling the situation?” The action, what are you naming them? Mercury has a lot to do with naming things.


And so this is not all to say that it’s just in the way that you think about it. “If you just change your mindset that’ll be different and then he’ll come back to you or he’ll be friends with you again.” I’m sure it’s much more complicated than that. But the first step can be just becoming aware of the stories that you told yourself about these things. And then you can decide, “Are those things true? Are you going to stand by them? Are those things that you want to change and that are actually hurtful to yourself if you keep telling that story, if you keep saying that thing?” Again, really focusing on yourself. We want to take care of yourself through this, not abandon yourself for the sake of something else.


Now we come to these two chalices. So where the swords were thoughts and communication, chalices are feelings and emotions and connections that we have with other people. A lot of times the characters in the chalices are holding chalices together and it’s just like, “We love this thing together. We have something bonding us and connecting us.” The Page of Chalices is a figure that’s really wide eyed and green and wants to explore these feelings in the purest way. Really thinking back to, “How did you feel about this at the beginning of this? What were those pure friendship feelings, whatever feelings that you were having?” Both looking back and remembering that you can have those feelings now if that makes sense. Pages just like Aces are invitations for new starts and new beginnings. Pages are a little more like “I’ve gone through something and now I’d like to try it again.” Aces are sort of like the first thing that’s going to happen. But this Page…They’re very imaginative. They’re very dreamy. They’re very romantic. And it’s an invitation to think about, I think, because you have these first two cards which are air and these second two cards which are water.


So you have what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling and it feels like there’s a disconnect. This is a story of confusion and like taking back power and creation, creating like, “Okay, I’d really love for us to be this. Can we try and be this after this?” This is a story of like dreaminess and hopes for what you could be and so is this (Seven of Chalices.) This is a card that has to do with dreams and “Okay, what are the possibilities that could happen?” While also pointing out, “Okay, at the end of this card, after you’ve come and seen all of these possibilities, you have to choose something and that might make all of the other things go away.” This card is Venus in Scorpio which is a very tenacious love, a love that you’re going to stick with it and you’re going to be so close—like the stories you could tell about this love. Because we started with the air and we’re ending with the water, what I see here is a move from your head to your heart. Rationalizing and thinking it through and even trying to communicate and really talk doesn’t always work. Sometimes you need that space. Sometimes you need that space for people to figure out how they feel. Sometimes you need that space to miss somebody, to remember, “Oh, you know what? I do need you in my life.”


Living together is such a close proximity. I’ve found in my experience it can be too much. And so I would listen to the feelings you have from this distance. And moving forward I would think about flowing with those feelings and those emotions instead of trying to rationalize it and talk about them if that makes sense. What feels—both air and water flow, but in very different ways—what feels like soothing to yourself right now? That might mean holding out hope and staying in this dream place. The Page is taking some of that and needing some of that energy and so maybe it’s there and you can have that feeling and hold it and all of the rational like “this is being stupid,” all of those should and outside thoughts you can keep out of it. It is a beautiful thing to still have hope for that and to have a feeling. Feelings are weird and you can’t control them and so if you feel it you feel it. So I would encourage you to start to own those feelings, to feel into them, to write more about those. Write more poetry and fiction when maybe you’ve been writing graphs and tables and proposals. Both of those energies are valid at different times, at the same time. You can logically know something and feel something and they can both be so true and it’s about being aware of that and then making that chose of like, “Okay, I have all of this material. I know all of these things. This is all the data. This is all the feelings. I’m in charge of what I’m going to create now, at least on my end. I can come to the table with what I want.” There was so much Venus in this reading. Love is so much more complicated than it’s seen in books and tvs. So that makes total sense to me. Love like can’t be explained and feels like the world, either the end of the world or the beginning of the world. And that’s all love—for family for friends, for everyone.


I hope that this reading was helpful. I hope that it gave you some hope. I hope that it gave you some facts. And I wish you the best of luck with the situation. To everyone else watching, thank you so much. Remember to subscribe if you’d like to be on the next misterwitchboy that’ll come out soon. And also stay tuned because I have some exciting things that I’m going to be releasing and sharing and teaching. You want to get on my newsletter for those things too. Alright thank you so much for joining me. I will talk to you soon. Bye!

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